Windfall Woman

Life and times of an older Brittany Murphy look-a-like still working as a sales executive after experiencing a life changing windfall a year or so ago

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Thursday, December 22, 2005

The Nutcracker, Friends, Roses and a Boyfriend

I think I mentioned that my Girl Scout co-leader and I were going to take our troop to see Belle in the ballet. I may not have mentioned that it was The Nutcracker. I just love the Nutcracker. Puts me even more in the seasonal mood every year. Anyhow, Belle was pretty excited as six of her closest friends were coming to see her as was her boyfriend. Yes, Miss Belle has her first REAL boyfriend at 12 years old. He's already scored some major points in that he actually TALKS to her at school, brought her a Christmas present (silver earrings and a Lynyrd Skynryd CD). Yes, the guy has taste! He invited her to his basketball games, and she went to every home one that wasn't on a "ballet" day. So, he gets her performing schedule for The Nutcracker. Gets his mom to bring him to last night's performance. Asks Miss Belle where the stage door is (before the performance). My co-leader and I were waiting with the girls at the stage door to pick her up (we were having a party afterwards) and A and his mom come down the sidewalk. He's carrying a bouquet of a dozen pink roses and a stuffed mouse! Belle springs down the stairs to cries from the Girl Scouts of "Oh Belle!!!!" She sees A at the foot of the steps and is glowing. She gives him a sideways hug and thanks him whereupon she is surrounded in a huge group hug by her fellow scouts. She returns to A again, thanks him for coming and gives him another hug. We all take off and Belle is on Cloud 9!

All of this led me to think about the choices I've made in my own life. Obviously, Belle has found a "keeper" boyfriend as well as "keeper" friends. Could I say the same thing about my own choices? Do I have friends who would stand with me no matter what? I can say with great conviction that I do have such friends. I also spend time and energy on people who wouldn't.

There is something so important to me that is even more important than my "windfall" if you can believe it. It's a little thing called "unconditional love." My definition of unconditional love is that love and acceptance that you receive regardless of how much money you have, what you do, who you are. A person or an animal that loves you no matter what. You look behind you, and there they are. They celebrate your successes and console you when you're down and out. The older I get, the more unconditional love becomes one of the most important values in my relationships. It's really a necessity with me, and if you can't give it to me and receive it from me, then you're best to move on down the line. Don't give me any fence devil's advocates......just give me your love and I'll give you mine. It's simple. And it's The Nutcracker during this season, and friends that stand in the cold waiting for you after a triumphant ballet performance, and a boyfriend brave enough to stand in front of grownups and a bevy of friends, giving you roses and stuffed mouse and TWO hugs.

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Blogger David said...

you pretty much said it
what can I add, but with the roadblocks that have been put up, and with the detours that life provides, the unconditional love delivery man has a challenge getting here on time. He goes over some rocky ground and sometimes when his delivery truck pulls up, the package in the back is banged up pretty good, or has fallen out on the last mile of the trip.
Hoping you can find what you are looking for. As for 12 year olds having boyfriends, IS HER MOTHER CRAZY!!! way too early, way to intense. Not on my watch.

10:43 AM  
Blogger Lauri said...

Sweet Belle.

Unconditional love is amazing. The only sad thing is that some people don't believe in it...

Christmas is almost here!

11:08 AM  
Blogger Cornbread said...

The only way that I know of to love someone unconditionally is to love yourself first. Love those who God brings into your life like you love yourself, maby even more. Tell me WFW am I wrong?

12:54 PM  
Blogger Jo said...

Belle had a night she will probably remember for the rest of her life. It's that kinda stuff that makes good people.
Here's to hoping that all of the love in your life is unconditional.

1:01 PM  
Blogger Amy said...

That is so sweet. Belle will probably never forget the sweet boy who brought her roses. *sigh*

Merry Christmas!

1:39 PM  
Blogger Ruvym said...

I'm a big fan of unconditional love, but how long does it take to get there? I was dating this girl a year ago, and it got to the point where I loved her regardless of everything that I saw wrong. She said she loved me too, but then when everything came apart, suddenly there were all these things she said helped her realize she "couldn't be with someone like me." I was like, "oh really, what about all that unconditional love stuff?" She didn't have anything to say back.

3:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd like to make asuggestion,..

please see the movie :


just in case deep down
youre gettin ready to take
a wrong turn.
instead of enjoying the holiday
season, with what you have.

Thanks for your gift of love
your writing since sep 05
i've enjoyed it , i've disagreed with some things, i learned a new recipe, and in general i really liked your spunk , help yourself
to make it last.

merry christmas windfall


5:51 PM  
Blogger kenju said...

If he could/would do that - at his age - then he is definitely a keeper! His mama raised him right.

8:02 PM  
Blogger ddddddddddddddddddddd said...

unconditional love is so amazing when we find it. However, it is a hard road to travel until we arrive.
And I love the Nutcracker at this time of year. It was a family tradition until last year started by my mom and something I had continued with my own kids until the separation.
Prayers, love and hugs.

10:57 PM  
Blogger bigwhitehat said...

Wow. Well written.

2:33 AM  
Blogger Grey Biker said...

Hope you have a merry christmas WW and somewhere along your path find a dozen roses as Free Bird plays in your ears.

8:40 AM  
Blogger Kitty said...

As always, a very thought-provoking and enjoyable post. I found myself doing a bit of head-nodding throughout, as I could so relate.

I've never understood how some people can 'claim' to be such very close friends and 'appear' to be when geography makes it a convenience but, when a little effort is involved (I've moved long distances six times in twelve years), then a little effort doesn't seem something they can even muster.

I've tried so hard to remain in contact with people that I 'thought' were my good friends -- telephone calls, letters, cards, e-mails -- after I've moved but, a lot of times I've discovered that what was touted as a deep friendship was merely an acquaintance of convenience and logistics. Out of sight, out of mind.

I hope that doesn't sound too bitter. I'm really trying not to hold on to the negativity, but ... it does hurt when you make the effort and people don't take the time to make some sort of reciprocating effort.

My s.o. is the same way, though. He says people are his friends, but he never makes any effort to stay in contact with them after moving. What kind of friendship is that? I send birthday cards every year to certain special people and he'll say, "did they send you one?" and when I say no, he says "why do you keep on sending them on every year?" It's because I want them to know I thought of them on their birthday, and that they mean something special to me.

Friendship, at least for me, is a very complicated thing. I wish it wasn't, but it is. There have been some 'major dramas' that have influenced the stories in my life, and dictated how situations have played out (through no control of my own), and we all have to play the cards we are dealt.

Enough of my inane ramblings . . . Thank you, W/W for posting this entry. I'm so very happy for Miss Belle, and appreciative of you sharing the story, and your insights on unconditional love and friendship. Blessings to you for all that you do.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Jo said...

I just wanted to say Merry Christmas to ya before I head out of town. I hope it's merry!

12:26 PM  
Anonymous Hale McKay said...

All I can say is - when that one with unconditional love shows up, he is going to be lucky fellow!
...You're obviously a beautiful girl, and since I have been reading your blog I have learned that you are also a beautiful person. Your time will come. Wishing the utmost in happiness for the holidays, and may you be mistletoed by that special guy.

7:28 PM  
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4:22 PM  

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